When I Can't Say "No"

How many times do you find yourself caught in a bind between two different things--good things--that you said, "yes," to? And how many times do you realize it's going to create a problem so you agree with fingers crossed behind your back? You said you would. You want to. Kind-of. Or feel like you should. So you hope and pray the conflict will work itself out before you have to.

Ugh. If you're like me, you hate, hate, hate that you got yourself in the situation to begin with, but you didn't know how to avoid it on the uptake.

The solution--although this is like one alcoholic talking to another--is simple but hard. Simple to understand in theory. Hard to do in practice.

I've spent the last few years memorizing the book of James, and it has a lot of practical application. Now that I've gotten to the end of it, these words keep smacking me up the side of the head: But above all, my brothers, do not swear, either by heaven or by earth or by any other oath, but let your “yes” be yes and your “no” be no, so that you may not fall under condemnation. (James 5:12).

Did you catch that? He says, "But above all..." Here's a quick review of "all" the things he's referring to. Above being joyful in trials? More than withstanding temptation? More than not showing partiality or living by faith or guarding my tongue? More than living apart from selfish ambition, repenting of sinful desires, and not boasting in the future? More than not taking advantage of the poor, grumbling against other believers or looking for the day of the Lord? Umm. Wow. "Above all...." do what you say you're going to and don't do what you say you're not going to.

OK. Easily said, but how? Here are a few things I'm learning and trying to apply when I want to do it all (knowing I can't):

1. Consider my priorities. My first priority is to please God. My second is to help my husband. Then care for our children and home. After that I can think about work, ministry, extended family, and community obligations. If the opportunity doesn't fit my priorities, I need to say no. It's not wrong. It's actually right.

2. Ask myself why I'm hesitant to say "no." This is a hard one, but so very, very important. If my reason for saying no is because I'll let someone down, I've already lost the battle. I will let them down if I'm not doing things right. Honestly, my reason for wanting to say, "yes," is almost always about me. I want a pleasant outcome from our conversation. I want them to think happy thoughts about me, how nice I am, how capable I am, how wonderful I am...are you ready to throw-up? Do you see how it can spiral way out of "nice-world" into "me-world?"

3. Acknowledge my limits. If I didn't need to eat or sleep I could do it all, right? Wrong. And, the truth is, we all have limits. We have a limited amount of free time, a limited amount of energy, resources, and thinking ability. Lest we think it's a sin to say "no" because of limits, think of our Lord Jesus. He experienced those same limits in His earthly body. The One who existed from eternity past took on a human form that confined Him to real needs--the need to eat, to sleep, to rest, to relax, to submit to authority, to be in one place at one time.... To be like Jesus means to acknowledge my limitations and serve God with what I have. He is able to order my day. All I have to do is trust Him and ask (Psalm 90:12).

4. Determine the price I'm willing to pay. I might be able to squeeze it all in, but at what price? Will I put my husband and family in a tough spot, feeling like left-overs, just to win someone else's approval? (see point 2). The truth is that when my goal is to please God and live according to His Word and standard, I cannot begin to imagine the blessings. But I do that by remaining firm and following through with what I know is best, not what I want or feel in the moment.

Any standard besides God's standard is a straw man. It has no will or force of its own. It cannot mete out the rewards or consequences it promises/threatens. It has no teeth--other than self-inflicted ones. If my personal standard is one of efficiency and busy-ness, I will bear the burden and consequences. If my standard is financial comfort or influence, I will forfeit eternal blessings for temporary ones. By living according to my personal values--or the values of someone else--I compromise the most important, meaningful parts of my life. What do I stand to lose? A clear conscience before God, inner joy and peace, a thriving relationship with my husband and children, my health, personal finances, loss of opportunity, influence, sanity, respectability.

A life lived by faith is one that says, "no," based on an understanding of godly, biblical principles. Saying "no," means I trust God with the outcome. Yes, I really want to do it all. No, I don't want to let people down. Yes, I want to be liked, admired and trusted by others. But over and above it all, I want to trust God with my efforts, choices, lifestyle and heart attitude. I want to live the humble life of a servant, to be like Jesus, to depend fully and confidently in my Heavenly Father, knowing His gifts are best, they are eternal, they are good, they are abundant--just like Him.

If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind. For that person must not suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways. (James 1:5-8 ESV)

Trust in the Lord, and do good;
    dwell in the land and befriend faithfulness.
Delight yourself in the Lord,
    and he will give you the desires of your heart.
Commit your way to the Lord;
    trust in him, and he will act.
He will bring forth your righteousness as the light,
    and your justice as the noonday.
Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him;
    fret not yourself over the one who prospers in his way,
    over the man who carries out evil devices!
Refrain from anger, and forsake wrath!
    Fret not yourself; it tends only to evil.
For the evildoers shall be cut off,
    but those who wait for the Lord shall inherit the land.

The steps of a man are established by the Lord,
    when he delights in his way;
though he fall, he shall not be cast headlong,
    for the Lord upholds his hand.
I have been young, and now am old,
    yet I have not seen the righteous forsaken
    or his children begging for bread.
He is ever lending generously,
    and his children become a blessing.

The mouth of the righteous utters wisdom,
    and his tongue speaks justice.
The law of his God is in his heart;
    his steps do not slip.

Mark the blameless and behold the upright,
    for there is a future for the man of peace.
But transgressors shall be altogether destroyed;
    the future of the wicked shall be cut off.
The salvation of the righteous is from the Lord;
    he is their stronghold in the time of trouble.
The Lord helps them and delivers them;
    he delivers them from the wicked and saves them,
    because they take refuge in him.  (Psalm 37:3-9, 23-26, 30-31, 37-40)

The Best Kept Secret

There are things we do, habits we form, ways of thinking and understanding our world that we take for granted. Since my mother-in-law moved in, we have discussions, assuming everyone thinks the same way we do when just between the two of us there are three opinions.

One of the best kept secrets--one of the things we say with our mouths and even agree with in our heads but don't actually believe--is that the Bible holds the secret to life. If we really, truly believed the Bible is directly from God, we'd pound it down first thing in the morning. We wouldn't make decisions without consulting it. We would want to know what it says that we don't know. We wouldn't gloss over the words or let it sit on the shelf untouched.

The truth is that we "know" it's important and good for us. We feel guilty when we think about how we "should" spend time reading and trying to understand it. But we never. quite. get. there. And, truth be told, sometimes, for a couple of days, we give it a go but the newness wears off, we don't quite get it and we fall back into living life.

Reading the Bible should be a conversation--God talks. We listen, We talk back. It's a circle. A conversation circle.

Here is some help for meaningful Bible reading. If you're not spending significant time getting to know God through His Word, you are missing out on the biggest part of your existence--one that will last for eternity.

1. The first thing my soul needs is an inclination to God and his word. Without that, nothing else will happen of any value in my life. I must want to know God and read his word and draw near to him. Where does that "want to" come from? It comes from God. So Psalm 119:36 teaches us to pray, "Incline my heart to Your testimonies and not to gain."

2. Next I need to have the eyes of my heart opened, so that when my inclination leads me to the word I see what is really there and not just my own ideas. Who opens the eyes of the heart? God does. So Psalm 119:18 teaches us to pray, "Open my eyes, that I may behold wonderful things from Your law."

3. Then I need for my heart to be enlightened with these "wonders." I need to perceive glory in them and not just interesting facts. Who enlightens the heart? God does. So Ephesians 1:18 teaches us to pray "That the eyes of your heart may be enlightened."

4. Then I am concerned that my heart is fragmented and that parts of it might remain in the dark while other parts are enlightened. So I long for my heart to be united for God. Where does that wholeness and unity come from? From God. So Psalm 86:11 teaches us to pray, "O Lord, I will walk in Your truth; unite my heart to fear Your name."

5. What I really want from all this engagement with the Word of God and the work of his Spirit in answer to my prayers is that my heart will be satisfied with God and not with the world. Where does that satisfaction come from? It comes from God. So Psalm 90:14 teaches us to pray, "O satisfy us in the morning with Your lovingkindness, that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days."

6. But I don't just want to be happy in my own little private world with God. I want my happiness to be as full as possible for spreading and expanding for others. I want to be strong in joy. This will make me durable in the face of threats or adversity. Where does that strength and durability come from? It comes from God. So Ephesians 3:16 teaches us to pray, "That God would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with power through His Spirit in the inner man."

7. Finally, I want my strength in Christ to produce good deeds for others so that the glory of God will be seen in my life. Who produces these good deeds? God does. So Colossians 1:10 teaches us to pray, "That [we] will walk in a manner worthy of the Lord . . . bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God."

All this I pray "in Jesus' name," because God gives these things to my soul only because Jesus died for me and removed the wrath of God so that the Father might "freely give me all things" (Romans 8:32).

(From John Piper: http://www.desiringgod.org/articles/how-to-pray-for-the-soul-yours-or-anothers)

The Danger of a Distant God

There is a sense among many Americans that God is there. He is real. Jesus died and rose again. And since I believe that, I'm a Christian.

How very, very dangerous.

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As long as God is distant from my everyday choices and thoughts, He is manageable. I can appease Him with a certain level of moral living and keeping my nose clean, going to church occasionally (or, even better, regularly), and making healthy lifestyle choices. Sure, I have a bad day here and there--who doesn't?--at least I'm not going to hell...or so I think.

But something's missing. I'm not sure what. I'm not sure why. What I do know is that when things don't go my way I habitually fight or fly and feel like a coward, or worse, a failure. I see my inner evil but excuse it, ignore it, blame it on everyone else.

In my mind, God is there but distant. He knows. He sees. But Jesus died, so it's all good. Right?

No. Not right. Review the opening statements of this post: Do you believe God is real? That Jesus was a real man, the Son of God? That He died on the cross and rose again? That does not make you a Christian. That makes you a realist.

How? you ask. Think of it this way: Does Satan believe God is real? Yes. Does Satan believe Jesus is a real man, the Son of God? Absolutely. Does Satan know Jesus died on the cross and rose again? Of course. It's his living nightmare. Is Satan a Christian? Never. And he never will be. He is the enemy of the cross, the deceiver, the accuser of the brethren, a murderer and liar.

So what's the difference? I must believe Jesus died for my sin. I must acknowledge my failure and failing, throwing myself on the mercy of God because only He can save me. If I don't beg God to forgive me based on the sacrificial death and resurrection of Jesus for me, personally, I will bear my punishment in Hell for eternity. That sin is mine, really mine. I am responsible, broken, sinful, needy, unworthy. I cannot fix myself or make it go away. What I need is a God who is close, who not only forgives me but transforms me; a God who makes me a totally new person, inside and out. I can't live my old way of thinking and getting by. I have sold out to God. He is the only One with power and the ability to forgive. It's my way or His. And when I lay down my arms and surrender, I give myself wholly, freely, and completely to the God who made a way to restore and change me.

His good, His best for me, isn't stuff. It isn't happy moments or a sense of accomplishment and trophies on the wall. God's good, my best, is to look at life through His eyes. To see people and circumstances the way He does. To live life the way Jesus did. That is a God near by. That is a God who is intimate, who isn't afraid to get messy, who doesn't shy away from my failure and gross selfishness. This is the God who saves.

And you He made alive, who were dead in trespasses and sins, in which you once walked according to the course of this world, according to the prince of the power of the air, the spirit who now works in the sons of disobedience, among whom also we all once conducted ourselves in the lusts of our flesh, fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, just as the others.

But God, who is rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in trespasses, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved), and raised us up together, and made us sit together in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, that in the ages to come He might show the exceeding riches of His grace in His kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast. For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them.

Therefore remember that you, once Gentiles in the flesh—who are called Uncircumcision by what is called the Circumcision made in the flesh by hands— that at that time you were without Christ, being aliens from the commonwealth of Israel and strangers from the covenants of promise, having no hope and without God in the world.  But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far off have been brought near by the blood of Christ. Ephesians 2:1-13

Why I Need a Turtle

So I had one of those "I've-been-ripped-off" moments and I tried, really tried, to reign in my emotions and thoughts. There was a sense of injustice and inequality that needed (!) to be settled in my mind. Although I made an effort and prayed about how to respond instead of react, I will admit that my heart, thoughts, and words were not desiring servitude and humility and much as fairness and acknowledgement of a wrong against humanity (ahem, yes, you know whose humanity).

It's never happened to you, I'm sure, but it happens in our home, in my life, in the lives of those around me, and it's a moment of growth. In the aftermath, the question has changed from, "Did I get what I wanted/deserved?" to "Did I handle that correctly?" And this time around, the question was somewhere in the middle: "Did I do any better than last time? Am I making progress?"

Because the truth of the matter is, life isn't perfect. I won't be seen or treated the way I think I should. My expectations are way (way) off and the other person's are, too. I'm not going to respond perfectly. And that's okay. But am I growing and changing? In the moment, am I seeing my desires for what they really are? Am I sensing my sinful tendency and can I name it? Am I guarding against my natural reaction and tempering it with a better, more thoughtful, God-honoring response?

And as I struggled with my heart, God revealed a very different area of sin than the one I was contemplating. Go figure. I thought I had done things right, considering how I felt. I was not demanding, but I communicated disappointment and asked for reconsideration. And as I listened to the radio, the voice said, So then, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath; for the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God. Oh, that. Well, yes, there is that slow to speak issue which I assume (i.e. overlook) often as my steam-roller passionate persona plows down the road of life with tearful sympathy, excited enthusiasm, or brief, but angry, outbursts.

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God said, "Gotcha!"

And I said, "Ouch. Yes, You did..." And now. Now begins the slow, hard work of living out repentance. Slow-ing-down and lis-ten-ing and think-ing and pray-ing before I speak so I can be swift to hear and slow. to. speak...and slow. to. wrath.

And maybe that's why God made turtles. So people like me have an example of God-glorifying intentional, determined direction. And how to take stock of when and where to cross the road--?

Turtles? Sorry. Brain noodling. It's all about Jesus. We're bound to fail. We hurt others. We don't please the Lord in all we say and do. But Jesus did. He stands in my place. He justifies me before God the Father and helps me work through and change here and now with His Word and by His Spirit. And as I slow down (or try to), I can trust Him to change me...and work the outcome to meet His purpose and plan--which He already has. Who could have orchestrated an I-got-ripped-off moment better than God?

And it's all good.

Use yesterday. Live today. Treasure tomorrow.

How often we fail to live well today because we're not using yesterday! Yesterday is a gift--its failures, successes, gifts and losses are meant to be used today. What kinds of things do I want to do differently? Avoid? Or seek after? How can I learn from them?

The greatest gift of the past, Jesus' life, death, burial and resurrection, is intended to be used and applied daily, not forgotten.  I can let go of past hurt and failure because Jesus died for that. I can live a new life because I'm dead to my old self and now I live for Christ, not me. For whatever things were written before were written for our learning, that we through the patience and comfort of the Scriptures might have hope. Romans 15:4

If I am not relying on the Word of God and the past presented there, I am not living the way I should--or could. God wants me to remember and use the past to live today and push forward into the future.

And how often do we fail to live well today because we're not actually living today? We're living in the past or borrowing from the future--making today both wearisome and difficult.

Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble. Matthew 6:34

Live now. Experience the moment. Laugh. Cry. Hug. Be alive! I need God's Word, His people, and His Spirit right now, this very hour. I need to depend on Him, to lean hard on and rejoice in Him, praise Him, seek Him, rest in Him, delight in Him. All those commands happen now! I can't change yesterday's obedience. I can't live tomorrow. But I have this moment. Am I believing right now? Am I obeying right now? Am I loving, giving and serving right now? This is the only moment I have.

And finally, how often do we fail to live well today because we don't treasure tomorrow? We borrow its trouble. We procrastinate, worry, fume and try to live in tomorrow when we should be looking to, and living today based on, tomorrow's treasure.

...I press on, that I may lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus has also laid hold of me. Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3:12-14

What does the future hold? My future is Jesus. And because I am confident that, not only will I see Him, but I know He gives good rewards, I am living today with my all.

Now to Him who is able to keep you from stumbling,
And to present you faultless
Before the presence of His glory with exceeding joy,
To God our Savior,
Who alone is wise,
Be glory and majesty,
Dominion and power,
Both now and forever.
Amen. Jude 24-25

Use yesterday. Live today. Treasure tomorrow. And be blessed.

Faith, Feelings and Hypocrisy

"But if I do what I don't feel like doing, doesn't that make me a hypocrite?"

I've heard that question many times and didn't always know how to answer. Isn't a hypocrite someone who says one thing and does another, or tells me to do one thing when they do something else? Yes.

So if I do something and don't feel like it, how does that count? If I go to church and don't feel like it am I a hypocrite? What about going to work? Working out at the gym? Doing laundry? Feeding my family?

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Interestingly the question only seems to apply to spiritual issues. We brush our teeth, clean the car, mow the yard, and prepare meals when we don't feel like it. Does that make us hypocrites? Dr. Bob Smith (M.D, Faith Church, Lafayette, IN) says the "natural" man (unbeliever) lives by nature; the supernatural man (believer) lives by faith. That helped me tremendously.

Before Christ was part of our lives, we made decisions and lived based on sensuous criteria. We did what we wanted--within reason--based on what we could see, feel, hear, smell, taste or based on our emotions and desires. You're familiar with the underlying message: "Follow your heart," "You deserve a break today," "Just do it," "I'm lovin' it," "Betcha can't eat just one...." The world  appeals to our sensual nature. We are driven and pulled by what we want and think will make us fulfilled.

But once we are bought by Jesus we have new, spiritual life. We are new creatures (2 Corinthians 5:17) with a different nature, created in holiness and righteousness for good works (Ephesians 4:24; 2:10).  To live and walk is this new nature is to live by faith instead of sight (senses). Think of faith as "believing God will do what He says He will do." (Hebrews 11:6)

Because I have been born again by faith, I live and make decisions based what God says in His Word. After all, I believe He will do what He says He will do, regardless of how I feel or what my senses tell me. As I pray and ask for God's help, reading the Bible becomes more clear. I see how He's working to make me more like Jesus and I trust Him to help me be kind, forgive others, speak the truth, treat everyone the same, be respectful of authorities, etc. I may not "feel" like doing any of those things at a given time, but I choose to, with the help of the Holy Spirit. I obey because I'm a new person. I no longer have to give in to what I want or what I'll get out of it or what makes sense based on what I see, hear, touch, smell, taste. That means I'm not a hypocrite. I'm living by faith just the way God intended in His original design.

Does that send emotions out the window? A life of gritting my teeth sounds miserable. You and I tend to think it's all one or the other, but God's plan is all-inclusive. He redeems not only our behavior, but our emotions and attitudes as well. He wants me to weep with those who weep and rejoice with those who rejoice. The difference is that when I live by faith, my emotions are under my control--under the Holy Spirit's control--instead of controlling me. Sinful emotions can be confessed, forgiven and forsaken. I don't have to be ruled by them, leading to a life of regret or remorse. Instead, I have access to hope, peace, joy, contentment, freedom from guilt and shame, and a renewed sense of purpose.

Living by faith doesn't mean a life of always eating vegetables and never getting dessert. Living by faith is more like eating such a balanced diet that I'm rarely hungry, my taste buds are satisfied, my body is healthy, and I have adequate energy to complete the day's tasks. It's a fulfilled, rare, rich life of purpose and identity. Am I sad sometimes? Yes. Do I fail? Yes. Do I give in to overeating, oversleeping, being critical, or snapping at others? Frequently. But Jesus doesn't love me more. He doesn't love me less. He picks me up, dusts off my bottom, and sets me on my feet... so "I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus..." by faith!

[Jesus said,] “I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you. After a little while the world will no longer see Me, but you will see Me; because I live, you will live also. In that day you will know that I am in My Father, and you in Me, and I in you. He who has My commandments and keeps them is the one who loves Me; and he who loves Me will be loved by My Father, and I will love him and will disclose Myself to him.” John 14:18-21

But whatever things were gain to me, those things I have counted as loss for the sake of Christ. More than that, I count all things to be loss in view of the surpassing value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them but rubbish so that I may gain Christ, and may be found in Him, not having a righteousness of my own derived from the Law, but that which is through faith in Christ, the righteousness which comes from God on the basis of faith, that I may know Him and the power of His resurrection and the fellowship of His sufferings, being conformed to His death; in order that I may attain to the resurrection from the dead.


Not that I have already obtained it or have already become perfect, but I press on so that I may lay hold of that for which also I was laid hold of by Christ Jesus. Brethren, I do not regard myself as having laid hold of it yet; but one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3:7-14

Be There...It's That Simple and That Hard

We've had illness at our house for the last few weeks and it's slow.ed. us. down. In times of physical discomfort and nurturing those who are uncomfortable, I haven't had any particularly insightful spiritual wisdom except...."presence." Simply being there--in the moment, sharing pain--is powerful.

"Was Jesus changing diapers at 3:00 a.m.? Cause that's what I need--someone who's been there."

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That's what a student recited at the high school play last week. We know Jesus was up at 3:00 a.m. regularly, praying (Mark 1:35, Luke 5:15; 6:12). We know He endured everything a man ever can or will; that He was made like us in every way (Hebrews 2:17-18). But His purpose was unique--and as a result, you and I are here. You. Me. We're here to be Jesus; to be one whose body fights weakness, fatigue, illness, hunger, lust, depravity--and who is redeemed, reborn, recreated.

For those of us who have accepted His payment for our sin, Jesus' presence is the power that moves and changes us. It's not a presence that's "out there." His Spirit is "in here"--dwelling, at home, living in and through us (John 14:16-17). And because Jesus is God, fully everywhere at all times, we can take comfort in knowing He is with us "always, even to the end of the age” (Matthew 28:20). His presence allows us to give up selfish desires and love others. It's a slow, day by day, year after year transformation. Not reformation. Not conformation. Transformation. Complete, radical change. And it is the living, breathing, loving life that gives hope, peace and comfort to those in suffering and pain.

Warning:
1) You can only be there if you've embraced and endured.
You may not have had exactly the same experience, but you can be there for someone else if you've worked your way out of bitterness, fear, resentment, anger or self-pity with God's help. If you haven't, you will help no one. You will only breed more: more bitterness, fear, resentment, anger and self-pity. Like a child's finger-painting, you will add to the confusion and chaos with dark colors of unconfessed sin. But if you've considered the prophets of old, who spoke in the name of the Lord; if you've run to the name of the Lord as your strong tower; if you've considered it joy to suffer and learn and grow then you can undergird, uphold, encourage, come alongside and bind up the broken-hearted.

2) You can only be there if you're there.
If you isolate yourself from the trouble of others, brush off another's hurt with words of platitude or condescension, refuse to get involved, or simply say, "I'll pray about it," you are not the presence and aroma of Christ. Loving yourself more than others is not a measure of presence but self-protection. Jesus did not protect Himself, He gave Himself freely and trusted His Father to meet His every need. The payment of His presence was pain, suffering, a life of poverty, and ultimately, death. Are you really willing to be Jesus in the life of others?

If you want to be there, if you're willing to enter another's hurt, offer your presence. Be Jesus. Tell them of His eternal forgiveness and the hope that's available in Christ. Live it. Share it. It's life the way He intended it.

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction so that we will be able to comfort those who are in any affliction with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For just as the sufferings of Christ are ours in abundance, so also our comfort is abundant through Christ. But if we are afflicted, it is for your comfort and salvation; or if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which is effective in the patient enduring of the same sufferings which we also suffer; and our hope for you is firmly grounded, knowing that as you are sharers of our sufferings, so also you are sharers of our comfort.

For we do not want you to be unaware, brethren, of our affliction which came to us in Asia, that we were burdened excessively, beyond our strength, so that we despaired even of life; indeed, we had the sentence of death within ourselves so that we would not trust in ourselves, but in God who raises the dead; who delivered us from so great a peril of death, and will deliver us,He on whom we have set our hope. And He will yet deliver us, you also joining in helping us through your prayers, so that thanks may be given by many persons on our behalf for the favor bestowed on us through the prayers of many. 2 Corinthians 1:3-11

And Jesus came up and spoke to them, saying, “All authority has been given to Me in heaven and on earth. Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” Matthew 28:18-20

Stay in Your Lane

"Why do I have to put on napkins? Carl's not doing his job."
"What did I ask you to do?"
"Put on napkins."
"Are you doing your job?"

Then I remembered these verses, "Peter...said to Jesus, 'But Lord, what about this man?' Jesus said to him, 'If I will that he remain till I come, what is that to you? You follow Me.'” (John 21:20-21)

That's the story my friend, Jess, shared the other night and it's stayed with me. It's so easy for me to blame other people for my failure; to get distracted by someone else and not do my part. As another friend says, "Stay in your lane." As soon as I start worrying about someone else or trying to "fix" them, I've crossed the line and am headed for a collision.

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Jesus said, "That's a none-ya" (none-of-your-business). "You. Follow me."

For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. A good man out of the good treasure of his heart brings forth good things, and an evil man out of the evil treasure brings forth evil things.  But I say to you that for every idle word men may speak, they will give account of it in the day of judgment. For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.” 
Matthew 12:34-37

For none of us lives to himself, and no one dies to himself. For if we live, we live to the Lord; and if we die, we die to the Lord. Therefore, whether we live or die, we are the Lord’s. For to this end Christ died and rose and lived again, that He might be Lord of both the dead and the living. But why do you judge your brother? Or why do you show contempt for your brother? For we shall all stand before the judgment seat of Christ. For it is written:

“As I live, says the Lord,
Every knee shall bow to Me,
And every tongue shall confess to God.”

So then each of us shall give account of himself to God.  Therefore let us not judge one another anymore, but rather resolve this, not to put a stumbling block or a cause to fall in our brother’s way. Romans 14:7-13

For the word of God is living and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the division of soul and spirit, and of joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart. And there is no creature hidden from His sight, but all things are naked and open to the eyes of Him to whom we must give account.

Seeing then that we have a great High Priest who has passed through the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold fast our confession. For we do not have a High Priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but was in all points tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need. 
Hebrews 4:12-16

What Does it Matter? What the Resurrection Means Today

At our Good Friday service, Pastor Tim Waldron asked, "What difference does the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ make in your life?"

In the quiet moments between remembering His death and celebrating His resurrection, I made a list of what life would feel like if I did not live in the reality of Christ's death and resurrection (I'd love to hear your thoughts in the comment section below--this is not a comprehensive list):

• I would look for meaning but fail to find "it." Driven by the desire to add value, gain other's approval, possessions, have fun, be entertained, and experience "wow," my life would pass, but with no eternal, godly value.
• I would lie awake at night in hopeless despair about tomorrow, next week, next year.
• I would feel pressure to solve all my problems: paying bills, raising children, resolving conflict, keeping my world safe and comfortable.
• I would chase distractions. I wouldn't want to be confronted with death or the idea of eternal judgment.
• I would feel very alone. Even in my marriage, with my family, children and best friends there would be a sense of isolation and exposure.
• I would be caught up in painful memories. The past would haunt me. I would wonder why they happened and how or if I could have changed the outcome. My days would be filled with avoiding similar circumstances and situations.
• I would seek laughter. I would create opportunities to express mirth: sarcasm, rude comments, cynical remarks, mocking and scorn.
• I would vacillate between being overly busy and slothful. I would work my mind and body until it couldn't function then check out for long periods of time, avoiding thoughts of the past and future, but caught in worry and anxiety.

That's me and my limited, sinful human tendencies played out in a life without Christ. And to be honest, even now I struggle with sin, failure and shame. But because of what Jesus did for me on the cross, I can go to Him and He will help me. He's just that big, that able, that caring, and that willing.

Because of Jesus' death for my sin and His resurrection from the grave:

• My life has meaning, purpose and value because everything about Him has eternal meaning, purpose and value. Even as I live on earth, I'm laying up treasure in heaven. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. (Matthew 6:20-21, 1 Corinthians 3:10-15)
• I sleep peacefully and completely, because God's got my back.  In peace I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, Lord, make me dwell in safety. (Psalm 4:8), In vain you rise early and stay up late, toiling for food to eat—for he grants sleep to those he loves. (Psalm 127:2)
• I have a responsibility to love God and my neighbor, to trust and praise God. He, however, is sovereign over all and promises to take care of me. He knows my needs and meets them.  He's all-seeing, all-knowing and all-powerful. For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. (Matthew 6:25-34)
• I have no fear of the future, of death or judgment because Jesus has been there and taken its punishment in my place. Consequently, just as one trespass resulted in condemnation for all people, so also one righteous act resulted in justification and life for all people. 19 For just as through the disobedience of the one man the many were made sinners, so also through the obedience of the one man the many will be made righteous. (Romans 5:18-19)
• I am never alone. Even in the darkest, most painful times of life, God is by my side; He is everywhere present. "And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”  (Matthew 28:20)  ...be content with what you have, because God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.”
   Hebrews 13:5)
• I still struggle with the past and pain, but as I read God's Word and submit to His design for my life I find peace, comfort and purpose in His will and way. He is eternal, knowing the end from the beginning. Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 3:13-14)
• My life is characterized by laughter. I take joy in the formation of the clouds, in the interactions of children, the beauty of daily life. I don't need to create laughter, it's all around me. God is a God of goodness, purity and joy. You will show me the path of life; In Your presence is fullness of joy; At Your right hand are pleasures forevermore. (Psalm 16:11)
• I am content with busyness and rest. I trust God with a day of rest each week, in illness, unplanned interruptions, demands, or emptiness. God knows and plans and uses and designs all things. Nothing happens without His say so. ...all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. How precious to me are your thoughts, God! How vast is the sum of them! (Psalm 139:15-16)

What difference does Jesus' death and resurrection make? All the difference in the world. As the disciple, Peter, said, "“Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life. We have come to believe and to know that you are the Holy One of God.” (John 6:68-69) And in knowing, in believing and doing, we find hope.

When Home Management isn't About Me

I grew up bringing boxes of treasure home from Goodwill. Now I have a trash container that goes the other way. Why? Because my husband is a tosser.

He's learned, after many years of marriage therapy, not to throw out any and every thing that doesn't suit his needs. And I've learned to accommodate his "less is more" philosophy--despite my genetic "winner keeps all" mentality. (Thank you, Cynthia Heald and the Bible study, Loving Your Husband.)

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Through wisdom a house is built,
And by understanding it is established;
By knowledge the rooms are filled
With all precious and pleasant riches. (Prov. 24:3-4)

If I desire to serve the Lord and our family, I need wisdom, understanding and knowledge. Apart from the principles and wisdom of God's Word, I cannot lay the foundation (build the house). By understanding the personalities and bents of the people in our home, we can establish routines and fixtures that foster peaceful, productive living. And by growing in my knowledge of each individual in our home, I can fill it with things that they find beautiful, precious and pleasant.

Our home can be a place of refuge, solace, comfort, encouragement, strength and refreshment. Need wisdom? Ask God (James 1:5). Need understanding? Read His Word (Prov. 1:1-7). Need knowledge? Stop looking at yourself and look at those around you.

As a woman, regardless of your station in life, your home can be built with wisdom, established by understanding and filled with precious and pleasant riches by knowledge. And now, back to cleaning out the closet...

10 Reasons I Love the Local Church

Although I grew up going to church, learning to appreciate "being" the Church has increased with time.

Read the following with two things in mind--
1) Not every church is the Church. A group of people that rejects the authority of the Bible and the supreme lordship of Jesus Christ may call themselves a church, but they are not "the" Church.
2) Every church is made of hypocrites, i.e. authentic sinners. You're there. They're there. It won't be perfect. On the other hand, Christ is there, too, so there's room for confession, forgiveness and growth.

Here are 10 reasons why I love the local church:

1) It's where Jesus is. Jesus promised that where two or three were gathered in His name, He would be there. His Spirit is alive in His people. In the Old Testament, God's people gathered at the temple. Now, those who belong to Him through saving faith are His temple. Being with God's people is a taste of Heaven because Jesus is there. "For where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I among them.” Matt. 18:20
Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body. 1 Cor. 6:19-20

2) The local church is a unique vessel of worship. Crowds may worship in a stadium, individuals may worship on a mountain top, but there is no where on earth that God is exalted in and through unique people from different backgrounds who gather regularly and give significantly to honor His presence, existence and gifts.
... that through the church the manifold wisdom of God might now be made known to the rulers and authorities in the heavenly places. This was according to the eternal purpose that he has realized in Christ Jesus our Lord, in whom we have boldness and access with confidence through our faith in him. Eph. 3:10-12

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3) The local church is many as one. Jesus unifies His people. He is the head, they are the body. Many diverse individuals with a single focus directs not just one or two hours a week, but every choice and moment, 24-7. It's not something we do or choose on our own. It's a supernatural work of God by His Spirit. We are called to be the physical body of Jesus on earth--in different places, in unique ways--to one another and to those around us.
Now there are varieties of gifts, but the same Spirit; and there are varieties of service, but the same Lord; and there are varieties of activities, but it is the same God who empowers them all in everyone. To each is given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good. 1 Cor. 12:4-7

4) The local church is a place of acceptance. Because the Church is Jesus' body in His absence, we find grace, mercy, and love here. If we love one another enough to embrace each other, we love one another enough to show our faults and assist one another. We need each other. [Jesus prayed,] "O righteous Father, even though the world does not know you, I know you, and these know that you have sent me. I made known to them your name, and I will continue to make it known, that the love with which you have loved me may be in them, and I in them.” John 17:25-26
Brothers,if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted. Gal. 6:1

5) The local church is a place of forgiveness. We cannot fully forgive one another--only Jesus can. He does not cover shame; He removed it. He does not excuse guilt; He absorbed it. We can overlook offenses and bear the price of other people's sin against us, but we cannot freely forgive apart from Jesus' forgiveness of us. ...as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. Col. 3:13

6) The local church cares. When crisis strikes and circumstances overwhelm, the local church is a place of practical, real help: meals, visits, prayers, safety. You are not alone.  Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ. For if anyone thinks he is something, when he is nothing, he deceives himself. Gal. 6:2-3

7) The local church is a place of health and healing. Our time and culture are inundated with mental illness, depression, and disillusionment. The local church gives us a proper perspective of suffering, sin, growth, life, death, loss, success and service. It is through the Word of God that we are changed. It is in the environment of the local church that we practice, fail and succeed. For God is not unjust so as to overlook your work and the love that you have shown for his name in serving the saints, as you still do. And we desire each one of you to show the same earnestness to have the full assurance of hope until the end, so that you may not be sluggish, but imitators of those who through faith and patience inherit the promises. Heb. 6:10-12
Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God. Eph. 5:1-2

8) The local church is a place of truth. Our world is confused and chaotic. The idea of relativity has worked its way into our daily lives and philosophy and we have blindly accepted it. It is only as we compare the thoughts and practices of our lives to the Word of God that we are free to live in truth. God's Word and God's people are anchors in a lost, drifting, changing world. We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ... 2 Cor. 10:5
Have nothing to do with irreverent, silly myths. Rather train yourself for godliness; for while bodily training is of some value, godliness is of value in every way, as it holds promise for the present life and also for the life to come. The saying is trustworthy and deserving of full acceptance. For to this end we toil and strive, because we have our hope set on the living God, who is the Savior of all people, especially of those who believe. 1 Tim. 4:7-10

9) The local church is a place of hope. In Jesus Christ there is hope, purpose, and a future. With our sin forgiven, we live a new life as newly created beings. Being part of the church in the hard times encourages us that suffering is an expected, normal part of life God uses to make us more like Jesus.
...if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. 2 Cor. 5:17.
Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. 2 Cor. 4:16-18

10) The local church is God's idea--it's where He wants His people. You and I, alone, doing our own thing, was the result of Adam and Eve's sin. They were all about independence. But God created us to be dependent on Him from the beginning of time. When we live according to His plan, we experience the joy, peace, contentment and freedom He desires. For now, that's the Church. It's where we come to worship, live life, encourage, and express our need for Him. The Church is one of God's tools (in addition to His Word and prayer) for helping us know, serve and love Him.
And [Jesus] came and preached peace to you who were far off and peace to those who were near. For through him we both have access in one Spirit to the Father. So then you are no longer strangers and aliens,but you are fellow citizens with the saints and members of the household of God, built on the foundation of the apostles and prophets, Christ Jesus himself being the cornerstone, in whom the whole structure, being joined together, grows into a holy temple in the Lord.  In him you also are being built together into a dwelling place for God by the Spirit. (Eph. 2:17-22)


If, after reading the above you either need to find a church or think you're in the wrong one, look at disclaimer #1. Each of us is responsible for choosing to be part of a church that glorifies and magnifies God. If you're not going or the church you belong to does not line up with Scripture and Jesus Christ's claims, it's time to pray and look for one that does.

If, after reading the above you think you're in the wrong church but #1 does not apply to your situation, you need to prayerfully be the change. That does not mean setting everyone else straight. It means following Jesus' example of sacrificial prayer, humility and love.

So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.

Therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed, so now, not only as in my presence but much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure.

Do all things without grumbling or disputing, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world, holding fast to the word of life, so that in the day of Christ I may be proud that I did not run in vain or labor in vain. Philippians 2:1-16 ESV

Managing Minutes

I watched our son climb the apple tree with a pair of loppers and begin pruning the branches. Nineteen years of watching, helping, seeing, learning, pursuing--and he is the expert. It's not the only thing he's done. It wasn't his greatest goal or focus, but it grew out of the unnoticed, quiet moments of life.

Life is about the minutes; the everyday, commonplace practices of life. I can't determine the outcome or dictate my future, but I can live intentionally in this moment. As God gives grace and I learn to live with an awareness of His presence, I can glory in the mundane. I can take joy in each moment's needs and train myself to invest in daily responsibilities and joys.

As someone who belongs to God and bears His identity, He is my primary priority. My time is His time. And when I consider the things that lie before me, none is more worthy than reading His precious Word and praying, asking for His help. Left undone, the hours unravel; the anchor is absent; the ship follows the way of the wind. Day after day; moment by moment. It begins with intention and delivers with action, trusting God with the outcome..

My second God-given priority is my husband--and for husbands, one's wife. There is no more vivid picture of God on the face of the earth than a husband-wife partnership. God created mankind in His image; male and female He created them (Genesis 1:26-27). It takes both to represent God. Amazing. Then, as the Bible unfolds, Jesus presents Himself as the Bridegroom for the Church (Ephesians 5:25-33). The picture takes on 3-D form. This isn't about people, it's about God uniting Himself with His one-of-a-kind creation. Wow! To think that in my daily moments, my care of my spouse is a reenactment of God's eternal essence and design? Moment by moment; choice by choice. It begins with intention and delivers with action, trusting God with the outcome..

Children are a natural outcome of the marriage relationship. God cares for children through us, their parents. This is my third biblical priority. These are my God-given disciples--the disciples I teach and train as I am going (Matthew 28:18-20). Moment by moment the story is told, day after day the minutes unfold. Simple things: brushing teeth, looking for God, listening to, talking to and trusting God, learning responsibility, being on time, loving others. These choices are practiced and learned day after day--or not. The consequences fall in both directions. Children don't suddenly do good things. They don't automatically become responsible.When we fail to train our children to do what is right and good, we are training them to do what is wrong and destructive (or negligent and lazy). It begins with intention and delivers with action, trusting God with the outcome..

God wants me to take good care of what He's entrusted. "He who is faithful in a very little thing is faithful also in much; and he who is unrighteous in a very little thing is unrighteous also in much" (Luke 16:10). He's given me so many blessings, abilities, time, resources, relationships, influence, opportunities--and He wants me to use them to make much of Him at work, in my community, church and organizations.

So the question for today is, where are the moments? How do I spend them? What have I been putting off?  The things I view as small and unimportant are the things that grow, expand and take on a life of their own. They bear fruit--good...or bad. It begins with intention and delivers with action, trusting God with the outcome.

And need I say--it's all about Jesus? Who started small, though Creator of all. He is the One who calls us to act based on trust.

Now may the God of peace Himself sanctify you completely; and may your whole spirit, soul, and body be preserved blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. He who calls you is faithful, who also will do it. 1 Thessalonians 5:23-24

There are four things which are little on the earth,
But they are exceedingly wise:
The ants are a people not strong,
Yet they prepare their food in the summer;
The rock badgers are a feeble folk,
Yet they make their homes in the crags;
The locusts have no king,
Yet they all advance in ranks;
The spider skillfully grasps with its hands,
And it is in kings’ palaces. (Proverbs 30:24-28)

Then [Jesus] said, “To what shall we liken the kingdom of God? Or with what parable shall we picture it? It is like a mustard seed which, when it is sown on the ground, is smaller than all the seeds on earth; but when it is sown, it grows up and becomes greater than all herbs, and shoots out large branches, so that the birds of the air may nest under its shade.” (Mark 4:30-32)

Then they also brought infants to Him that He might touch them; but when the disciples saw it, they rebuked them. But Jesus called them to Him and said, “Let the little children come to Me, and do not forbid them; for of such is the kingdom of God. Assuredly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God as a little child will by no means enter it.” (Luke 18:15-17)

Where's Jesus When We Need Him?

The woman looked at me, pain in her eyes, "Is there anything you can do to help?"
It was a moment for honesty. "I can't solve the problem or make it go away. But together you and I can find God in this. It's an opportunity for you to draw near to Him. Together, we can find peace. You can have peace with God and peace in this situation." I paused. "Are you willing to give it a try?"

We used to say love makes the world go round but that's not true anymore. Psychology makes the world go round. When a problem or crisis hits we may google it, ask our closest friends, or, if it gets really--I mean "really"--bad, we may talk to the pastor. Then, after days and weeks and months of struggle, we look for professional help and seek a psychologist or psychiatrist. That may or not make a difference.

If you are a person of influence in your church, you have had opportunity after opportunity to speak to broken, hurting hearts. And if you're a person like me, those hearts are not only outside, but inside your home--and your head as well.

Let me challenge each of us to get real about who Jesus is and what He can do. Does He love me? Real, down-to-earth love or love that was written on a page 2,000 years ago and forgotten? Does He know what's going on my life? And does He care? If it's true that He cares, where is He in this mess called life?

You and I can quote rote answers to the questions of life and suffering, but until we have tried Him and found Him true, until we know Him, have studied and questioned and lived Him, we can never place our full weigh and dependence on Him. If you are struggling with not seeing Jesus right now, where you are:

- Pray and ask God to reveal Himself. He wants to be found (Isaiah 55:6)
- Spend time daily reading God's Word and calling out to God. If you don't know where to start, begin with Psalm 42 and continue. Make lists of who God is and what He does as well as proper responses to His wonders, grace and love.
- Praise God. Yes, that's right. Praise Him. Offer a sacrifice of thanksgiving. God is worthy--even in our pain. Put Him in His rightful place with your prayer, words and actions.
- Seek help from godly sources. Talk to your pastor, a godly friend, or biblical counselor. Seek books that exalt God and direct your focus to Him in the midst of your suffering.

When we have tried and tested Him ourselves, we are equipped and able to answer those who ask, "What can you do for me right here, right now?" In that moment, we will say, "Not I, but Christ. He is here. He is waiting. He is enough." And in that moment, as we love and give of our lives in response to their pain, Jesus has given, is giving...and loving--through me and you. Will you be His Body, broken for them?


  
^"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”

After Jesus said this, he looked toward heaven and prayed:

“Father, the hour has come. Glorify your Son, that your Son may glorify you. For you granted him authority over all people that he might give eternal life to all those you have given him. Now this is eternal life: that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent. I have brought you glory on earth by finishing the work you gave me to do.And now, Father, glorify me in your presence with the glory I had with you before the world began.

"I have revealed you to those whom you gave me out of the world. They were yours; you gave them to me and they have obeyed your word. Now they know that everything you have given me comes from you. For I gave them the words you gave me and they accepted them. They knew with certainty that I came from you, and they believed that you sent me....

"I am coming to you now, but I say these things while I am still in the world, so that they may have the full measure of my joy within them. I have given them your word and the world has hated them, for they are not of the world any more than I am of the world. My prayer is not that you take them out of the world but that you protect them from the evil one. They are not of the world, even as I am not of it. Sanctify them by the truth; your word is truth. As you sent me into the world, I have sent them into the world. For them I sanctify myself, that they too may be truly sanctified.

"My prayer is not for them alone. I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message, that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you.... 

"Righteous Father, though the world does not know you, I know you, and they know that you have sent me. I have made you known to them, and will continue to make you known in order that the love you have for me may be in them and that I myself may be in them.” (John 16:32-17:26 NIV)

Imagine

Crunch of ice; foggy breath;
dreary sky; grass of death.


As I walk across the yard it's hard to imagine that a few months from now the grass, plants and trees will be overgrown. The air will be thick with heat and humidity. Flowers will be in full bloom, dotting the landscape with bold and bright colors.The same world; a different world.

Winter. Summer.

Mourning cry; meal of tears;
clenching gut; house of mirrors.

As I walk through life from day to day, it's hard to imagine that the absence of breath is eternity. For those in Christ, there will be no tears. No sadness. No death, pain or sorrow. All will be Christ. Light. Life. Beauty. The same world; a different world. A better world. A new world.

Now I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away. Also there was no more sea. Then I, John, saw the holy city, New Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from heaven saying, “Behold, the tabernacle of God is with men, and He will dwell with them, and they shall be His people. God Himself will be with them and be their God. And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away.”

Then He who sat on the throne said, “Behold, I make all things new.” And He said to me, “Write, for these words are true and faithful.”

And He said to me, “It is done! I am the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End. I will give of the fountain of the water of life freely to him who thirsts. He who overcomes shall inherit all things, and I will be his God and he shall be My son. But the cowardly, unbelieving, abominable, murderers, sexually immoral, sorcerers, idolaters, and all liars shall have their part in the lake which burns with fire and brimstone, which is the second death.”  (Revelation 21:1-8)

Jesus, Bullies and Me

Our American schools have an incredible anti-bullying campaign running these days. In preschool, children hold out a flat hand and set the other on it vertically to say, "Stop." At older levels they're taught to say, "I don't like what you're doing and I want you to stop." Recently I encountered an adult bully. That's a little trickier, isn't it? (Pssst. It's not you--unless we already had this discussion.)

http://images.parenting.mdpcdn.com/sites/parenting.com

Jesus dealt with bullies: Pharisees, Sadducees, scribes, teachers of the law. They were determined to have their own way, regardless of right, wrong, better or best. At the heart of their behavior was influence.They wanted to feel and look important, but Jesus kept getting in the way.

When they sought to seize [Jesus], they feared the people....  (Matt. 21:46)
And they were seeking to seize [Jesus], and yet they feared the people.... (Mark 12:12)
Therefore when the people saw the sign which He had performed, they said, “This is truly the Prophet who is to come into the world.” (John 6:14)
And all the people were trying to touch Him, for power was coming from Him and healing them all. (Luke 6:19)
And [Jesus] also told this parable to some people who trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and viewed others with contempt.... (Luke 18:9)
The Pharisee stood and was praying this to himself: ‘God, I thank You that I am not like other people.... (Luke 18:11)
The scribes and the chief priests tried to lay hands on [Jesus] that very hour, and they feared the people.... (Luke 20:19)

In the end, it was envy and jealousy that drove them to have Jesus crucified, For "for they loved the approval of men rather than the approval of God." (John 12:43).

Isn't that why we give in to bullies? We want the approval of men, too. We don't want to make waves or deal with conflict, so we give in and move on. But what if we loved God more? What if we loved Him so much that we loved bullies more than ourselves? In that case, I would not only refuse to give in, I would speak and live truth. "Stop. You're hurting yourself and you're hurting others. I love you too much to let you continue. Did you hear what you just said? Do you see what you're doing?"

That kind of love holds the mirror of God's Word where they can see it. Jesus said it like this:
“Either make the tree good and its fruit good, or make the tree bad and its fruit bad; for the tree is known by its fruit. You brood of vipers, how can you, being evil, speak what is good? For the mouth speaks out of that which fills the heart. The good man brings out of his good treasure what is good; and the evil man brings out of his evil treasure what is evil. But I tell you that every careless word that people speak, they shall give an accounting for it in the day of judgment. For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.” (Matthew 22:33-27)

That's not politically correct or warm and fuzzy. It's honest. In his (justified) anger, Jesus did not sin, He loved. He forgivingly chastised and rebuked. By His words and actions, He led them to the cross. He showed them their sin and gave them (one more) opportunity to confess and repent. That should be our greatest desire for those who sin against us--eternal life, eternal forgiveness, eternal blessing.

I can be angry, especially when someone hurts and misleads others. I can speak against their wrong, but in the end, I must love them, be ready to forgive, and willing to lead them to Jesus.

Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep. Be of the same mind toward one another; do not be haughty in mind, but associate with the lowly. Do not be wise in your own estimation. Never pay back evil for evil to anyone. Respect what is right in the sight of all men. If possible, so far as it depends on you, be at peace with all men. Never take your own revenge, beloved, but leave room for the wrath of God, for it is written, “Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,” says the Lord. “But if your enemy is hungry, feed him, and if he is thirsty, give him a drink; for in so doing you will heap burning coals on his head.” Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. (Romans 12:14-21)

It's Not the Doing

Recently I've been challenged with how much of life is being, not doing. Who I am--when the difficult times come, when frustration mounts and plans are shattered--who I am cannot be controlled or contained. I am who I am. The difficulty doesn't create anger, fear, doubt, bitterness and resentment; it reveals what's already there, in my heart. I can only hide revulsion for so long. It's bound to explode under pressure. I may ignore fear and cover it with false confidence, but it will sink deep teeth into my heart when situations race out of control.

What I say and do in the unexpected moments of life is nothing more than what (or who) I am. If I am humiliated by my response, that is the least of my worries. What others think of my outbursts or tendency to run and hide matters very little--because the root issue is my sin. It's the heart that seeks its own way, that demands independence and makes self-righteous claims. Such a heart offends the Great God of the Universe. How often do we get caught up in pleasing others and wanting our way (all at the same time), failing to consider how we--how I've--spit in the face of my Savior.  In that moment I am no different than those who walked past Him that fateful crucifixion day. I am more concerned with my agenda, saving face in public, my accomplishing my goals than offending the God who took on humanity, lived a humble life and died that I might know Him and live.

The snake on the pole--Jesus--the "Look and live!"--has been cast aside. Disregarded. In self-deception and a desire to "do," I have failed to "be." Until the inner me surrenders and is voluntarily overcome with Christ, who would live in and through me, I will fail without hope. I will cry without relief. I will wrestle without victory.

So this has become my mantra, "Not I, but Christ." When I fail and fall and sin--not I, but Christ. I am forgiven. I am redeemed, I am re-purposed. I can confess and move forward in faith. When I experience victory and blessing--not I, but Christ. He is the blessing-Giver, He is the Rewarder, the Provider. In every situation, in every relationship, in every conviction or success, in loss or gain--not I, but Christ. Why? Because it is not in the doing. It's in the Be-ing.

I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me. (Galatians 2:20)