A Heart of Stone

There was weeping. I could hear the broken, stifled sobs; the high pitched hiccuping sound that mewed from the back of the sanctuary in waves. As I sat quietly during the communion service, head bowed in prayer, my heart tightened and air froze in my lungs. More than Scripture, this humble response to Jesus' beating, crucifixion, and death restrained me. I found myself asking how many times I had heard the same verses, even read the same verses aloud, and remained unmoved. And now, here was one so torn, so distressed, so in love with the Savior that her sobs could not be contained.

In the book, Revolution in World Missions, David Mains describes a recent working of the Holy Spirit in India this way, "It would hardly have been different...had Jesus Himself been bodily among us. The spirit of worship filled the hall. The singing was electrifying. The power of the Holy Spirit came upon the audience. Men actually groaned aloud. I have read of such conviction in early American history during times like the two Great Awakenings, but I had never anticipated experiencing it firsthand."

It was John Owen who wrote, "Let faith look on Christ in the gospel as he is set forth dying and crucified for us. Look on him under the weight of our sins, praying, bleeding, dying: bring him in that condition into the heart by faith; apply his blood so shed to thy corruptions; do this daily....A mind filled with the love of Christ crucified...will be changed into its image and likeness, by the effectual mortification of sin...." (A Quest for Godliness, J.I. Packer, p. 200-201).

As I look on my sin, my weakness, my failure, I come exposed, realizing how seldom I am broken at the foot at the cross. "If anyone wishes to come after Me, he must deny himself, and take up his cross daily and follow Me;" "For my yoke is easy and my burden is light" (Luke 10:23, Matthew 11:30).