Where's Jesus When We Need Him?

The woman looked at me, pain in her eyes, "Is there anything you can do to help?"
It was a moment for honesty. "I can't solve the problem or make it go away. But together you and I can find God in this. It's an opportunity for you to draw near to Him. Together, we can find peace. You can have peace with God and peace in this situation." I paused. "Are you willing to give it a try?"

We used to say love makes the world go round but that's not true anymore. Psychology makes the world go round. When a problem or crisis hits we may google it, ask our closest friends, or, if it gets really--I mean "really"--bad, we may talk to the pastor. Then, after days and weeks and months of struggle, we look for professional help and seek a psychologist or psychiatrist. That may or not make a difference.

If you are a person of influence in your church, you have had opportunity after opportunity to speak to broken, hurting hearts. And if you're a person like me, those hearts are not only outside, but inside your home--and your head as well.

Let me challenge each of us to get real about who Jesus is and what He can do. Does He love me? Real, down-to-earth love or love that was written on a page 2,000 years ago and forgotten? Does He know what's going on my life? And does He care? If it's true that He cares, where is He in this mess called life?

You and I can quote rote answers to the questions of life and suffering, but until we have tried Him and found Him true, until we know Him, have studied and questioned and lived Him, we can never place our full weigh and dependence on Him. If you are struggling with not seeing Jesus right now, where you are:

- Pray and ask God to reveal Himself. He wants to be found (Isaiah 55:6)
- Spend time daily reading God's Word and calling out to God. If you don't know where to start, begin with Psalm 42 and continue. Make lists of who God is and what He does as well as proper responses to His wonders, grace and love.
- Praise God. Yes, that's right. Praise Him. Offer a sacrifice of thanksgiving. God is worthy--even in our pain. Put Him in His rightful place with your prayer, words and actions.
- Seek help from godly sources. Talk to your pastor, a godly friend, or biblical counselor. Seek books that exalt God and direct your focus to Him in the midst of your suffering.

When we have tried and tested Him ourselves, we are equipped and able to answer those who ask, "What can you do for me right here, right now?" In that moment, we will say, "Not I, but Christ. He is here. He is waiting. He is enough." And in that moment, as we love and give of our lives in response to their pain, Jesus has given, is giving...and loving--through me and you. Will you be His Body, broken for them?


 
^"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”

After Jesus said this, he looked toward heaven and prayed:

“Father, the hour has come. Glorify your Son, that your Son may glorify you. For you granted him authority over all people that he might give eternal life to all those you have given him. Now this is eternal life: that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent. I have brought you glory on earth by finishing the work you gave me to do.And now, Father, glorify me in your presence with the glory I had with you before the world began.

"I have revealed you to those whom you gave me out of the world. They were yours; you gave them to me and they have obeyed your word. Now they know that everything you have given me comes from you. For I gave them the words you gave me and they accepted them. They knew with certainty that I came from you, and they believed that you sent me....

"I am coming to you now, but I say these things while I am still in the world, so that they may have the full measure of my joy within them. I have given them your word and the world has hated them, for they are not of the world any more than I am of the world. My prayer is not that you take them out of the world but that you protect them from the evil one. They are not of the world, even as I am not of it. Sanctify them by the truth; your word is truth. As you sent me into the world, I have sent them into the world. For them I sanctify myself, that they too may be truly sanctified.

"My prayer is not for them alone. I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message, that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you....

"Righteous Father, though the world does not know you, I know you, and they know that you have sent me. I have made you known to them, and will continue to make you known in order that the love you have for me may be in them and that I myself may be in them.” (John 16:32-17:26 NIV)

Creating a Biblical Counseling Office

Maybe you, like me, never said, “I want to be a biblical counselor when I grow up.” I didn’t know they existed. I wouldn’t have known what one was if you’d told me. But now I know who they are. They’re real people in real skin with real struggles that come alongside other real people in real skin with real struggles. Biblical counselors are Jesus in our midst, individuals God has gifted to teach and equip those who are hurting and seeking change within the local church.

After acting as an advocate for a friend who sought biblical counseling, opportunities to counsel continued. During this time, my husband expanded his business and created an office I could use any way I chose. Prayerfully, I set it up for writing and counseling, but could find nothing (nothing!) online under the heading “design biblical counseling office.” If you are a pastor, you’re no doubt equipped, but if you’re a counselor-in-training, you’ve probably wondered how to create an effective place to meet and interact with counselees.

Here are some things I found helpful and true:
- If possible, separate your meeting space from your living space.
- Decorate with appealing colors and art work.
- Make yourself at home, but keep it clean.
- Think about your counseling style and function: would you prefer meeting at a table with chairs or in easy chairs with a coffee table? Keep it comfortable; choose furniture that accommodates different shapes and sizes (i.e. women feel vulnerable if their feet don’t touch the floor).
- Invest in scent-appeal. Keeping a consistent scent will help counselees feel at home and link learning from one session to the next. 
- Place a white board within easy reach of your chair.
- Strategically place a clock on the wall behind your counselees.
- Offer water or coffee on arrival and/or as needed.
- Provide Kleenex and pens within reach of counselees.
- Place a wastebasket near the door.
- Provide Wi-Fi if possible.
- Use white noise if you’re within earshot of others.
- Keep files: professional and personal. Create separate filing systems. Include diagrams and hand-outs at the ready for counselees.
- Keep books well-organized and within reach. You will need them.
- Be prepared to look up Scripture references in guides books or online.

Notes:

- I’ve counseled over the phone, chasing children, doing laundry and sitting in the kitchen with a cup of coffee, but a home presents a sense of obligation for me to host and the visitor to be polite. It’s difficult to work around intrusions and distractions. This can be easily overcome, but must be intentional.
- As much as possible, make the room appealing. Avoid a sterile, clinical environment. People like to have something to look at when they’re thinking or taking time to respond. Strategically provide art or Scripture that redirects or refocuses their attention.  You will spend more time in this room than anyone, so choose things that encourage and refocus your thoughts as well.
- My office has three easy chairs with a round coffee table because I counsel women and welcome advocates. You may choose to seat a different number of people or meet at a table with chairs. The choice is a matter of function and preference.
- Most often I usher counselees to the chairs on the far side of the room and sit closest to the door. On the wall beside that chair is a dry-erase board which is very helpful for diagrams, explanations, Scripture verses or interactive discussion. Across from my chair is a clock which allows me to be polite and punctual. Keeping my word means ending appointments on time.
- The most important function of my office is at-homeness and comfort. I want counselees to feel safe, wanted, prepared for, and listened-to. It should look, feel and smell like somewhere they want to be.
- Have a place to keep files. Not only will you want to keep duplicates of counseling hand-outs and articles, you will want a protected place to keep files of counselees. You may find it helpful to keep Bible study materials, personal Bible journals, and professional files as well. I have found it best to keep separate file systems, organized alphabetically by topic or by the books of the Bible.

But you, beloved, building yourselves up on your most holy faith, praying in the Holy Spirit, keep yourselves in the love of God, looking for the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ unto eternal life.
And on some have compassion, making a distinction; but others save with fear, pulling them out of the fire, hating even the garment defiled by the flesh.

Now to Him who is able to keep you from stumbling,
And to present you faultless
Before the presence of His glory with exceeding joy,
To God our Savior,
Who alone is wise,
Be glory and majesty,
Dominion and power,
Both now and forever.
Amen.

(Jude 1:20-25 NKJV)

Writing Your Life's Letter

In our church circle, missionaries come home every few years and travel from one supporting church to another, giving stewardship reports and sharing encouragement. Years ago a missionary from India challenged us, "Each one of you should be able to stand up at any time and share fifteen-minute's worth of what God is doing in your life. If you don't have that much to share, you need to get busy." In my mind, I often stop and wonder what I would share if I had fifteen minutes to tell someone what God's doing. That's where this blog comes in.

As I consider what I would say--or write--to supporting churches and individuals, I think about what's important. How am I using the gifts and abilities God has given? What if others were footing the bill? Would that make a difference in how I use what I have?

If I had to justify the use of money this last month, how it was used for the Lord and His kingdom, how much would I have to tweak? Could I share honestly and judiciously with a clear conscience?

If I was called on to explain the use of my time--both professional and personal--it would be obvious who's important. Would my time reflect more love for God or for myself? Would someone who loves the Lord wholeheartedly provide financial support based on the way I spent my time?

And relationships. Am I intentional about building relationships with those who don't know Christ? Do I seek and invest in people regardless of how they make me feel, or whether or not I have to leave my comfort zone? What drives my relationships and the ways I choose to give of myself, even within our local church Body? Who do my friendships belong to? Me or God?

You'll notice I'm not going to answer my own questions--at least not here and now--but it's something I think of often. I ask myself, "If I sat down and wrote a letter like the apostle Paul, or my missionary friends, how would it encourage others? Would I be able to say, as Paul said, 'Follow me as I follow Christ?'" How about you? What would your letter say?

The truth of the matter is, our life is being recorded. There is an eternal record and it's not based on what others give us. It's a real-time, honest, can't hide-behind-curtain-number-two account of what the Lord has given. And, though we may not speak of it often, there will be a day we stand before Almighty God and justify the use of those gifts: time, money, relationships. May He be pleased by our dependence and trust in Him as we live each month, each day, each moment, for His glory, by His grace.

we are always confident, knowing that while we are at home in the body we are absent from the Lord. For we walk by faith, not by sight. We are confident, yes, well pleased rather to be absent from the body and to be present with the Lord.

Therefore we make it our aim, whether present or absent, to be well pleasing to Him. For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, that each one may receive the things done in the body, according to what he has done, whether good or bad. Knowing, therefore, the terror of the Lord, we persuade men; but we are well known to God, and I also trust are well known in your consciences.

For we do not commend ourselves again to you, but give you opportunity to boast on our behalf, that you may have an answer for those who boast in appearance and not in heart. For if we are beside ourselves, it is for God; or if we are of sound mind, it is for you. For the love of Christ compels us, because we judge thus: that if One died for all, then all died;  and He died for all, that those who live should live no longer for themselves, but for Him who died for them and rose again.

Therefore, from now on, we regard no one according to the flesh. Even though we have known Christ according to the flesh, yet now we know Him thus no longer.  Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new. Now all things are of God, who has reconciled us to Himself through Jesus Christ, and has given us the ministry of reconciliation, that is, that God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself, not imputing their trespasses to them, and has committed to us the word of reconciliation.

Now then, we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God were pleading through us: we implore you on Christ’s behalf, be reconciled to God. For He made Him who knew no sin to be sin for us, that we might become the righteousness of God in Him. (2 Corinthians 5:6-21)