Got Grace?

It's not something we usually say (or admit to thinking), but here it is: grace is a scary thing. Why? Because we don't really deserve it. And if I didn't do anything to earn it, why me and not someone else? And why me? Period. One girl recently said about Jesus, "That sounds too good to be true. I think I'd better take you up on it!"

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Grace is great when we feel like it's the icing on the cake--we did something well but got more than we expected. Grace is great when it's within reason--somehow we can repay the kindness, make it up, or pay it forward. That kind of grace makes me feel good about myself.

But too much grace? Too much grace makes me feel wrong. Unworthy. Undeserving.  A gift can be too expensive. It can read too much into a relationship. There must be a mistake. Something is wrong...

And that's the way of God's grace toward us. It's simply too much--or is it? In my mind, I know God's not wrong--but my heart doesn't want to admit that my sin is really that bad.... and that God's grace is really that good.

What does it mean that God actually left heaven and took on earthly form? Was it really necessary that He give himself over to be tortured, mocked, humiliated and mutilated? When I try to get my mind around what it cost Jesus to die and pay the debt of my sin, I can't imagine it. To think of how much pain and suffering God the Father experienced to buy me back from the slave market of sin, I will never fully comprehend it. That is His grace--something He didn't have to do, but chose to, because of love.

If He did all of that, then there must be something I can bring to the table.... Perhaps He saw ahead of me and knew I would do this special thing or be a wonderful kind of person?

He saved us, not on the basis of deeds which we have done in righteousness, but according to His mercy... (Titus 3:5)

And you were dead in your trespasses and sins, in which you formerly walked according to the course of this world, according to the prince of the power of the air, of the spirit that is now working in the sons of disobedience. Among them we too all formerly lived in the lusts of our flesh, indulging the desires of the flesh and of the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, even as the rest. But God, being rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in our transgressions, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved)... (Ephesians 2:1-5).

I didn't do good deeds. I was actually dead (dead  people are rather useless). I chose to live in disobedience and rebellion. Life was all about me and getting what I wanted.

And that's what makes grace so uncomfortable. Unsettling. It's not about me anymore. It never was. It's all about God's goodness and grace--goodness, grace and riches that He lavishes on those who come, by grace alone, though faith alone, in Christ alone (Ephesians 1:8; 2:8-9).

Got grace? I will lavish as much grace on others as I take hold of myself. In my grumpy moments, my selfish moments, my didn't-get-my-way moments: I have been given limitless grace at no cost to myself. I have received more than enough grace to forgive an offense, let go of a grudge, return good for evil, confront with love, and give generously. What does it cost to give it to others? Only that which is dead, forgiven, removed, and best forgotten: pride, self-seeking, envy, anger, bitterness, resentment. To give grace is to die to self.

Grace. It's just that amazing...

Wait! I Can Do Better than That!

Would you agree that one of the greatest frustrations is our own limitations? We want to do more, be better or different... How much time, effort, brain power and money do we spend in our struggle to overcome obstacles?

People like Oscar Pistorious, the Olympic amputee blade-runner, stir up bittersweet emotions. If he can overcome, so can we. Then the bitter--we try and fail, try and fail. His success spits in the face of our failure at lesser things.

One of the most wonderful things I'm learning is personal limits. They're real. They exist. And I'm starting to recognize that I don't have to overcome them, or power through them. I don't have to create excuses or cover stories. Simply acknowledging them, as humbling and disappointing as it may be, has been a great relief.

Perhaps its our American culture. Maybe it's ingrained pride. Whatever the source, it pushes and drives; wall after wall after wall.

Growing older, reading the Bible daily, and praying (sometimes desperately) have given way to a deeper peace; a restful contentment. There are things I can do. There are things I can't. I will never be 5'8," easily reaching the top shelf in the kitchen. The struggle is real. I cannot function on too little sleep. On the other hand, I have a lot of energy that drives people crazy and am learning to harness my enthusiasm. My hair will do what it will do and there are certain things it simply. doesn't. "do."

We creatures, flawed and finite, have limitations. Each of us has been made with a unique bent and personality, set of besetting sins, gifts, abilities and strengths. You are a unique person with unique limits. The problem? I don't want to acknowledge or live within them. I want to overcome, walk on the moon, shoot through the galaxy. Ah, yes, the problem.

The problem is I am not God. I cannot be who I am not. I cannot make myself someone or something--and I shouldn't. God made me with a plan, purpose and design that includes limitations and takes into account sin, faults and failures. It's in my sinful, wanting-what-I-don't-have state that I begin anew to build the tower of Babel; reach the sky on my own; to create what was never intended.

The solution? Rest. It's one of the most-used repeated words and concepts of the Bible.

Jesus said, "Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls." (Matthew 11:28-29).

God says, "Rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for Him; Do not fret because of him who prospers in his way, Because of the man who brings wicked schemes to pass." (Psalm 37:7).

Rest. Wait. Re-lax! That is one of the greatest, most difficult, most freeing acts of humility we will ever practice. I used to read the words, "Humble yourself" and wonder how to do that. As I learn and grow and continue to ask questions, this is one way to humble myself--to acknowledge and bow the knee to my God-given limitations.


Lord, my heart is not haughty,
Nor my eyes lofty.
Neither do I concern myself with great matters,
Nor with things too profound for me.

Surely I have calmed and quieted my soul,
Like a weaned child with his mother;
Like a weaned child is my soul within me.

O Israel, hope in the Lord
From this time forth and forever. (Psalm 131)

That's No Good! Or is it?

"That is so unreasonable!"
"Are you sure?"
We don't say it aloud, but it's what we often think about God. Like Eve in the Garden of Eden, we find ourselves failing in answer to the question, "Did God really say?"

In my limited, tainted understanding I disbelieve God's goodness. I doubt that what He has just provided is a good idea, the right answer, just what I need. There is something about my will that wants an easy life, a convenient one, with access to the things that tickle me plump. Miscommunication with a friend or mate, an upset in my schedule or long line at the store are just enough to make me question God's goodness.

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What if...what if we took God at His Word? What if we walked in that same gospel that saved us? The gospel says Jesus died for me. Rose for me Lives for me. And if I have accepted that on faith, It is not a once-is-enough-moving-on act of faith. It is the beginning of a life lived in that same faith, day after day, moment by moment

What if we grasped the fact that His good isn't our good? That He is infinite and holy? And His good is for me to be like Jesus--dying to myself and living for God instead? Humbling myself and approaching my friend or mate with gentleness is God's good--it's a step toward being like Jesus. Accepting God' interruption to my schedule graciously and acknowledging His lordship and direction is a better thing. How much better to be like Jesus than myself? And waiting patiently in line at the store is one more way to express content that God is working all things (all of them) for the good of making me more like Jesus.

Jesus had no agenda of His own. "For I have come down from heaven not to do my will but to do the will of him who sent me." (John 6:38 NIV)

Jesus did not demand His rights. "Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage; rather, he made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness...." (Philippians 2:6-7 NIV)

He loved His enemies. "Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous person, though for a good person someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." (Romans 5:7-8 NIV)

And, although Jesus suffered and died--it was all for God's good plan. It was God's love for you and me that brought about His death. It is His continued love for us that drives His work in our lives. He did not save us to simply drag human corpses to Heaven. He saved us to change us--to recreate us into something better. He is providing opportunity after opportunity for us to walk in faith, joy, peace, goodness and kindness. I do this by taking hold of His promises and acting on them...in faith, believing God is good (1 Peter 1:3-4). This circumstance is for my good. This interruption is for my good. This tragedy is for my good. This is a purposeful act of God. And God is good. Believe it....or not.

Not only so, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for our adoption to sonship, the redemption of our bodies. For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what they already have? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.

In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God.

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified.

What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. Who then is the one who condemns? No one. Christ Jesus who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written:

“For your sake we face death all day long;
    we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.”
No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39 neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Romans 8:23-39